Here's "Paradox" by JJ Asher. This is the forst novel in the A New Paradigm series.
["I know now, for certain, that I've made a deal with The Devil. I'm just not sure yet if I've sold him my soul as well.
Jintae—nineteen, desperate, and done letting his parents script his life. His brilliant escape plan? Drop out of college and vanish into the wilderness, hiding in the off-grid cabin of his brother’s best friend until the storm blows over.
The problem? That best friend is running too.
Eden—thirty-four, newly single, and in no mood for company. Especially not the perfectionist teenager with too many brains, and too little sense, that's always gotten under his skin.
He craves solitude.
Abandonment has hollowed him. Heartbreak has left him bitter and violent. So when Jintae shows up uninvited, he throws him out—until the kid begs. He offers himself up as a live-in servant, and Eden agrees… On brutal terms.
But what started as punishment soon turns into something Eden can't name. Jintae challenges him, haunts him, tempts him. Under the fury is heat. And under the insults is a pull neither of them can outrun.
Snow traps them. Secrets rot between them. And the boy Eden swore to stay away from becomes the one thing he can't stop craving."]
These two...fuuuuck me, these two. They were dangerous and horrible and sweet and pining and angsty and mean and kind and just...a lot. They were a lot. The hurt/comfort was real. The back and forth was rough. The utter denial was painful. But the eventually fall? Sooo worth it.
This felt more than a bully-romance. The bullying was a lot and borderline (or not so borderline) not okay. Maybe it was the life-and-death situation and full-on abuse. Or the probably undiagnosed personality disorder.
But when they fell? They fell hard. They fell fast. They fell deep, pulling each other in more and more, revealing more and more secrets, opening up to each other more and more. Even if reality wasn't too kind to them, they were to each other.
Trigger Warnings: off-page cheating, gaslighting, physical violence, mentions of emotional and psychical parental abandonment, non-con, and more.
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